What Superhero's can teach us about healing

There are moments in life when everything changes such as a relationship ends, a career no longer feels right, an illness changes what we’re capable of, a dream doesn’t work out the way we hoped. Suddenly, the life we imagined disappears, and we’re left wondering who we are now.

Without giving away major spoilers, Spider-Man: Brand New Day explores exactly this feeling. Peter Parker is forced to build a new life after losing the people and future he once knew. While most of us won’t be swinging through New York fighting villains, many of us know what it feels like to wake up and think…“Where do I go from here?”

Starting over can feel overwhelming but it can also become the beginning of something meaningful.

We Often Grieve the Life We Expected

When life changes unexpectedly, we don’t just grieve people or places, we can find ourselves grieving the future we imagined, the version of ourselves we thought we’d become, the routines that once made us feel safe, the identity we’ve built over the years.

It’s okay to acknowledge those losses! If you are currently grieving this loss, firstly I want you to know it is normal to grief this loss. In any grieving process there are stages that we go through, denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. Grieving can take years, so if you have been grieving for over a year and feeling frustrated with yourself right now, please show your self some self love and know that grieving can’t be rushed, there is no deadline for grieving.

A Brand New Day Doesn’t Mean Forgetting the Past

Starting again doesn’t erase your past experiences. All our past experiences shape us into who we are, each experience is valuable it may have taught you: resilience, courage, compassion, patience etc.

Your past becomes part of your foundation, not a weight you have to carry forever. When we are grieving we can find ourselves trying to answer this question: “Why did this happen to me?” when we should be trying to answer this question instead: “What has this experience taught me about myself?”

That single question can shift you from surviving towards growing.

You Don’t Need the Whole Plan

When we are faced with starting a new chapter in our lives, it can all feel uncertain and we can feel lost not knowing what to do or what action to take. We often believe we need to have everything all figured out before taking the first step, but growth rarely works like that.

To make progress in our new chapter we simply must begin with one small decision, this could be as simple as introducing a boundary, giving ourselves one act of self-care. Simple small steps create a new direction.

Make Small Decisions

A brand new day doesn’t arrive because life suddenly becomes easier. It begins the moment you choose to stop waiting for yesterday to return and start creating tomorrow with intention.

Like Spider-Man, you may not have chosen every challenge you’ve faced but you can choose what you do next. Whene we make that choice we give ourselves hope, you don’t need to have it all figured out, simply make small decisions and begin.

Reflection Time

Grab yourself a pen and paper for a few minutes reflect on the following questions.

Looking Back

• What chapter of my life am I still holding onto?

• What have I been grieving without recognising it?

• What strengths have I developed because of my challenges?

Looking Within

• Who am I becoming?

• What values matter most to me now?

• What do I need more of in my daily life?

Looking Forward

• If fear wasn’t making this decision, what would I choose?

• What does my ideal “brand new day” look and feel like?

• What is one small action I can take this week?